Lord my way is like yours in that it is also the way under the cross. I want to stop for a moment and think about how I carry my cross. I want to discover you in my life and ask for mercy at each stop. I bow down before You crucified Jesus with deep gratitude, touch. I know so little I offer you, I would like to give you my heart filled with love. So far, I am afraid to look at you because my love is slight. I wouldn’t dare even speak, but I take your words in my mouth. In heaven there is more joy over one sinner who repents, than over 99 who do not need it. Lord, my way is the way of a sinner. Please guide me to repentance.
I. First stop: Conviction to death
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
I’m doomed to death, to suffering. That’s how people decided. This knowledge is overwhelming, terrible. Often my life is decided by another. He judges me many times, he condemns me. It judges man and can be wrong many times. He doesn’t see everything. He can’t stalk. He cannot be merciful, loving, forgiving.
Sir, You saw my condemnation and therefore you came to receive it instead of me. Let me understand how wrong, unfair and cruel my judgments are. At every conviction, someone suffers, dies. Help me think of the pain I inflict on you and your neighbor, because You are always where someone is condemned.
Sir, I don’t want to judge anyone, I’d rather accept a conviction.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
I. Second stop: Jesus takes the cross
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You
I do not cry with pain and disappointment. God comes to my aid. He won’t leave me alone – he takes the cross, he goes with me instead of me? It does not explain why. Love is silent. Sir, help me rejoice that I’m not alone under the cross.
You carry him with me from the very beginning. More pain, burden, you carry! I am just a piece you give me to be in your presence; to participate in the work of love. You only expect me to be ready to move. Sir, let me understand that only man has chosen the pain. It’s my choice. But God wanted me to come to joy.
I take the cross, for under him I meet a loving God. Through pain I go to joy.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
III. Third stop: First fall under the cross
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
When did I fall for the first time? I do not remember the first fall. There are so many falls in my life. There’s no healthy place on me. Sir, let me understand that I carry the cross. I cannot go upright to look into people’s eyes and wait for participation, understanding, gratitude, respect. I am such that even under the cross I want to be strong. Pride brings me down. I hear mocking notes at my address. Nobody appreciated my exertion. How do I get up, Lord?
Help me find you in the dust, mocked, scorned… Lord, let me long for humility. Put the grace of this fall into my heart. Let me find love in humiliation, in dust. God has fallen into the dust under my cross. I’m not leaving you alone.
The cross won’t be so hard for me to get rid of pride. Lord, I am getting up with you already and I am not afraid of falls that will strengthen me.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
V. Fourth stop: Meet with Mom
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
I bear the cross. I suffer. I do not suffer alone, but with You Lord. The pain intensifies and I find it hard to accept it. I have not met anyone who knows its value and encourages me on the way. The world around me is marked by shallowness, edibility. According to the world, pain disfigures man’s face, scares fear. It touches me too, it penetrates deep. I want to run and leave the cross thrown on the road.
Sir, now I turn to You and Your gaze I want to find the missing eyes of Mum. Mary, look into my eyes and let me feel that the pain I need, that it purifies me, is approaching Jesus. Put something of your strength into me to pass through the people to the place of Golgotha.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
V. Fifth stop: Simon’s help
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
The cross pushes to the ground. How often I complain about it. My cross is my illness, my family, the environment I live in and the hardest cross I am myself. My cowardice, pride, distrust, selfishness, jealousy, laziness, sensuality, self-love. My cross is difficult. I would much like to carry those strangers. Foreign pain does not affect me. It doesn’t knock me down. Indeed, I often do not see her. I meet a man and I don’t see him being crushed by the cross. And I often go unnoticed. Occasionally someone or something forced me to carry his cross.
Sir, help me to see my neighbor carry the cross. And let me be with him but not by force. Such help hurts more. I want to be with him because he carries a cross that I myself cannot do. In the suffering I want to see you. I want to help you run the cross. I want to participate in the cross that leads me to redemption.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
VI. Sixth stop: Veronika
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
Veronika is missing on my Stations of the Cross. Meeting a person who sees what others don’t understand. Maybe he cannot bear my cross, but this meeting has citizenship. It will cleanse my face of spits, blood and sweat. It returns my lost form. Furthermore, I will get worse because I know that I am loved. Sir, at this stop I want to thank for friends, for priests. The priest and friend have the grace of Veronica. He sees to the heart. And on your knees I thank You, the merciful Jesus, for putting the priest’s scarf of repentance in the hands of the priest. I beg you for my confessor. With which hands you purify my soul. He will have a bloody scarf.
Lord, give him mercy so that my filth may not hurt him painfully, so that after the sacrament of repentance my pure face, rewarded with gratitude, love and strength, bear the cross.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
VII. Seventh stop: Second fall
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
Fall again. I’m in dust and dirt. I realize my weakness. I see that when you walk, only You give me strength. But I fell! I looked into the dust that blocked my eyes. – And for a moment I wanted to fall. I thought I’d be relieved that I wouldn’t bother with the cross for a while – and stay on the side of the road. So I lie here, but this rest did not bring me the expected relief. I’m choking on the dust and adding a new wound.
Where are you, Lord? Didn’t you turn away from me? Will you find your face in this dirty face? Sir, You fell under the cross a second time so that I could spread my hands to You. Sir, pick me up! Set me up by the grace of your fall, that I may rise and leave sin that has hurt me in the dust.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
VIII. Eighth stop: Crying women
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
Crying. Usually, we cry when I lose something expensive, or we cry with disappointment. Maybe I cause tears to loved ones who have failed in me. Lord, let these tears never escape, lest I pass unnoticed beside who is crying for my sin. She teaches me to cry over her. Often it is He who sees my sin more clearly than I do. Lord, give me the gift of tears above you. I ask for tears of repentance and repentance. Let them flow on MY FACE – then it is the pearls I will bring to you on Golgotha.
Sir, help me not to cause suffering to my neighbor on my journey. How difficult would my journey be if it was accompanied by so many complaining glances ?!
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
IX. Ninth stop: Third fall
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
I embarked on a journey of repentance – tear over me. I haven’t really stepped and I’m falling. My eyes are tear-free, and someone is crying. She is crying for me. It will be very difficult to look into the eyes of the sufferer. Lord, when You feel the third time, it was a manifestation of the greatest love and trust in God. I beg you for this love and trust. Give me the grace to get up. Do not look at you, but into your eyes. I ask not only for myself, but also for those who will be offended because of my fall.
Sir, my downs are taking me down for strength, but I want to believe that, despite my weakness, You are strong. I want to get up and move on. Lord, only You can give me the power to stand up even when according to others my path is doomed to failure, when I am wretched and I do not want to fight the sins that take my strength. Don’t let me give up.
Sir, help my unbelief!
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
X. Tenth stop: Dress deprivation
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
A naked person is a person devoid of respect and dignity. Lord, when they pulled your clothes from you, they uncovered your wounds. The soldiers wanted to get rid of everything. You didn’t defend yourself! Sir, I defend myself! I want others to think respectfully about me, I do not accept criticism, although it is often true. Sir, I beg you for the gift of humility, I beg you for the grace of this halt. Let them cut off my clothes, let me get rid of everything that separates me from you. Only one is afraid that my nakedness will be painful, for offense …
Lord, give me scars of love. Let me hide my love under my clothes. Don’t forget that I’m naked before your gaze. I can’t cover anything, embellish anything. Lord, let me be never violent in those who cut clothes, but in those who commit injustice…
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
XI. Eleventh Stop: Nailed to the cross
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
I’m nailed to the cross. Is it a definite fusion of the cross ?! I carry the cross. It’s hard, but sometimes there is someone to help me with it. I can take it away for a moment, relax. Sir, you want more. I look at Your cross – oh forgive me! I look at my cross and you’re nailed to it. I nailed you to it. You let me. Sir, I’m sorry now. I truly regret the sins that nailed you to the cross. I can feel your love, love without measure. I’d like to tell you, along with a thief, that you don’t forget me. What a joy a rascal on the cross must have felt after your promise. Sir, I beg you for this bastard grace, for this knowledge that I deserve the cross.
Sir, I want to accept the cross – definitely. I don’t want to take it out of my shoulders as a burden. Nail my hands to open my arms, pierce my heart. Sir, you see how far I am from this stop. It is beyond my power to accept contempt, ridicule, to give up everything, to accept the deepest solitude, to be thirsty.
Sir, I’m running under the cross, hugging you, and thank you for taking my pain.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
XII. The Twelfth Stop: Dying
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
A person is born only once and dies all his life. I often resist dying, death is painful. Every day brings me closer to death. I’m losing something every day. Sir, what shall I die? In my heart there are so many desires, plans. I know – many would be far from you. How good they are just a dream. I would like to have a treasure in heaven.
Lord, give me the wisdom to see things and everything around you in Your light. Let me understand that when I die to myself, when I forget about myself, when I give up my will, when I long to do what you want, then you are closest to me. Such death leads me to life.
Lord, for Your dying, which lasted for 33 years, and for death on the cross, give me the grace of humility, wisdom, virtue of dedication, forgiveness. Put the desire for dying in my heart.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
XIII. Thirteenth Stop: Composition of the Cross
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
Sir, at this stop, I want to be pleased with the hope that you alone will take me off the cross. The pain subsides. You will hold me in your arms. I know I will forget all the pain at that moment. Please, Lord, give me this grace upon death in Your arms. Mother Mary bring me here. Help me on my way. I am your child who is on his way home. Don’t let me get lost to something that is holding me back and delaying the meeting. Mary, I think of you as mum. Your pain is immense. You want to keep every child in your arms. Please help me to think of everyone as brother and sister. I do not want to come to You alone and see the pain in Your eyes. Mother, pray for Jesus’ heart full of love. Dear Jesus, Bring my family, friends, all my dear ones into the arms of my mother.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
XIV. Fourteenth Stop: Burial
K .: We bow to You, Christ, and bless You.
Grave. You’re dead. Sir, I know you are alive, but I still often doubt. Often I act, I mean, I keep you out of my life. I think of you as dead, as someone who can’t help me. I make you helpless, blind, deaf. You’re dead to me! Oh, God! what am I doing? I don’t want you dead. I desire you to live in my life. Change my heart. A breakthrough seal on the grave where I imprisoned you.
Lord, be my God! Be me all! Be my love! Sir, lead me to the empty grave. I want to be Mary Magdalene, who will believe and love you above all. Give me true love, living faith and unbreakable hope. I do not want to end my journey at the sealed grave, I want to meet you among the living.
K .: Crucified Jesus, have mercy on us.
Conclusion
Thinking about my life journey brings me to humility. There are many falls on it. Little trust, devotion, patience, dedication. There is little love in it.
Dear Jesus, I want to follow the path you have prepared for me. I don’t know what awaits her, I just know it will be a trip to Golgotha. Sir, I want to step out, but my arms are full. So much to keep that cross I would not bear with this burden. Lord, get rid of everything. I give you my fear, my comfort, cowardice, mistrust, selfishness, pride, loneliness, all my misery and a piece of love and desire to belong only to You and to desire only You.
Lord, empty my arms to embrace the cross, to love you as you want to be loved by me….
Amen
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