It is a particular dynamic in service and decision-making, sometimes even balancing on the edge. It’s happened to me a few times that I didn’t guard it and fell to the other side. I really stepped on the brake at the last moment. I’ve been trying to be more careful about it ever since. However, I can’t always do it one hundred percent. My age, which is still moving, also comes into play, and I had to accept that I was not getting younger.
I realize that I once managed it much more easily than I do today. It’s a whole school that learn to find the right balance at all times.
Can you be more specific?
About ten years ago, I felt physically and mentally enormously exhausted. I asked the then Bishop’s father for a sabbatical year, but I didn’t get away with it. And so, I made an internal decision not to accept invitations to various lectures, conferences, or spiritual exercises for the following year.
However, Mr. Bishop entered it again, who sent me to be a parish priest in Východná, where I stayed for four years. In the end, it turned out to be a good solution, as pastoral care in the parish has specific rules and laws that helped me slow down and stabilize internally. However, it took me almost a whole year to learn to be a parish priest.
We will get to your parish work in a moment, but let’s stop at your request for a sabbatical year. We are aware of cases where priests burned it, burned down the building, and did not dismantle it; they left the priestly service. How to prevent such cases?
The burnout of a priest is always a harrowing experience – for him, for his loved ones, and for the community entrusted to him. No need to pretend it’s not happening. Some brother priests devoted themselves to the service without rest, without discernment, often even without sufficient accompaniment, and their heart and body could not handle it. Sometimes they left the priestly service; other times, they stayed, but often they carried deep wounds.
How to prevent it? First, we need to recognize that even a priest is only human, honestly. He is not a superhuman machine that can handle anything. He also has limits; he needs sleep, rest, friendships, silence, time with God without duties, and an ordinary human conversation, during which he is not a „pan parish priest“, but Janko or Marek.
It is essential to cultivate inner balance because when you are determined inside, not only do you feel it, but also everyone around you.
If one of these priests asked you for advice, what would you say to him?
The most important thing is prayer. But not to the point where I have to cross it off; otherwise, I would have regrets. Prayer is not just a kind of obligatory ride: in the morning, I quickly renounce the breviary to smoke it, and I move on. No. Prayer is a source. And when you drink from the spring, you come alive. You feel life suddenly start flowing into your veins. If prayer becomes just an agenda, there is a danger that the soul will begin to dry up. Suddenly, you become nervous and irritable; people get on your nerves, and your sermons don’t come from your heart because you feel empty.
For many, silence can also be a form of prayer. Just sit in front of the Lord and let him speak. Because we don’t always have to be full of words. God knows what’s in our hearts even before we say it. And sometimes just being can be the deepest and sometimes the most difficult prayer.
Next, it is definitely necessary to have someone to talk to, and not only about the weather, cars, and responsibilities, but also about what we really experience deep down. A priest needs to have a spiritual guide, confessor, or friend with whom they can discuss their joys and concerns, without fear of being judged. That’s a significant relief.
At the same time, it is essential to receive a positive, safe reception. To have a place where we can be ourselves in absolutely everything, without fear. Loneliness is a silent killer. We need people where we can experience being accepted. This is a huge gift when you know that someone likes you just as you are. Not because of what you do or what position you hold, but because you are who you are.
What about the rest itself?
It is often pushed aside. Priests sometimes go in one piece. But God himself took a break after six days of work, and man could enter rest with God on the first day of his life. So why do we think we can go non-stop? We also need to turn off – either with family, friends, or simply by doing something that recharges our batteries.
Finally, believers must be sensitive towards their priests and take responsibility for them. This is not because they should save them, but because priests also need to experience the support and love of the community. Even a simple thank you, a smile, or a prayer for a priest can provide valuable support.
Saint John Paul II said: ‘Priests have a mission to encourage people to convert. They can fulfil this mission only if they have experienced a deep conversion themselves, that is, if they are focused on God with all their heart and all their strength.” In order to be there for people, a priest himself needs to remain anchored in God, love and humanity.
Preventing burnout is not a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength. Instead, it is a sign of maturity and humility. Even if someone does fall, the church should be a merciful mother who helps them get back up again, not a judge.
Having received this helpful advice, let’s proceed with your work in Východná. What did you find most straightforward and most difficult in the parish?
The great thing was that I didn’t have to travel as much. That doesn’t mean I didn’t travel at all, though. With the help of amazing parishioners, we went on trips and pilgrimages, and organised camps. I attempted to create a sense of family through relationships and a sense of belonging. However, the pandemic then came, and everything slowed down.
I had to deal with economic matters, such as the need for reconstruction work at the church and parish. However, teaching religion in elementary school probably took up most of my time. I enjoy speaking to audiences, including children, but after the first four hours of school, I was exhausted..
Is East the only parish you have worked in so far?
Yes. Before that, I served as a chaplain in Žakovce for another two and a half years, immediately following my ordination. But in an environment among homeless people, it was more of a special than a classic parish pastorate. However, I was also accompanied by people from the parish, including children and youth.
Where did your steps from Žakoviec go?
I was less than twenty-seven years old, having undergone two spine operations, and Mr. Bishop entrusted me with the management of the House of Charitas St. Ján Bosco in the Spišská Chapter. He is also called the Green House and retired senior priests live in it, now the clients there are also lay people who are cared for by religious sisters and lay employees.
This stop was also a school for me, I learned a lot there too, I could listen to priests who had rich life stories and talk to them. I began to understand old age more and realized that, even if I lived, I would one day be old.
At that time, I also served as a chaplain in Spišská Kapitula parish for several months. There was a cathedral and five other churches. I celebrated Holy Mass in a different place every day. During the school year, I attended Mass every day with children in attendance.
Two years later, I moved from Kapitula to Važec, where we started constructing a youth centre and developing youth pastoral care within the Diocese of Spiš. Later, when I became chairman of the Association of Christian Youth Communities, I expanded this work to cover the entire country of Slovakia.
I worked in Važec for a long time, until 2011, when I was called to Lux Television to help rescue this vital project, which was in serious trouble at the time. After completing my term of office and overcoming health problems relating to my spine, I was appointed parish priest in Východná.
When someone looks at your CV, they may notice that, after working with young people all your life, you usually stay in one place for three or four years before moving on. How would you explain this?
A moment ago, we discussed the fact that new invitations keep coming into my life, and a new door opens for me. In this, I see my mission – come, help move things, pass the baton, and move on. It’s something normal for me.
Your approach to life is the polar opposite of that described by the Czech priest Štěpán Smolen in his spiritual bestseller Be Where You Are. In it, the author revisits the concept of the Desert Fathers, who believed that life should be lived and aged in one place and in one occupation.
I have read Smolena and agree that there is a lack of stability in my life, as she describes. However, this is not because I am internally unstable, at least not to my knowledge, but because this is how the Lord guides me. To me, stability with God is more important than stability of place. A person does not have to live their whole life in just one parish, monastery, or project; they can experience their mission fully in different places..
Personally, I am grateful for the opportunity to have lived among the homeless, as well as among politicians, old priests, and young people. I am thankful that I had the chance to learn construction work while wearing overalls, as well as management while wearing decent clothes. During a talent test, I realised that I am a fast learner. There must be something in it.
However, most priests have the opposite view. As chaplains, they are in one place for several years, and later as parish priests for more than a decade. Would you make it?
Internally, I would have to process it and accept it, put it all on the altar. But I probably could do it. After all, I worked in Východná for four years, and it was a great time for me. And if it was God’s will and the bishop sent me again to some other parish, I would go.
Over the years, have you learned to strike a balance between body, soul, and spirit?
It’s something you learn all the time; I’ll probably never be able to say that I’ve completely mastered it. But the truth is that, over the years, I have learned to listen to my body. I can tell when I’m starting to feel exhausted and need to take a break. Having had multiple spinal surgeries, going for a walk, swimming, and relaxing have become a medical necessity for me.
But the priority is taking care of my insides, my relationship with God. For example, I recently traveled from early in the morning, had an indulgence mass, lunch, and didn’t stop until six in the evening. Nevertheless, I was deeply immersed in my relationship with God all the time, and it was a truly wonderful day for me.
How did you manage it?
When I travel alone in the car, I like to turn off the ringer on my mobile, pray, and play some slow instrumental or worship music. After Mass, I had an impromptu meeting with a group of friends who are physically disabled. We had a nice time together. When I got home in the evening, I watched a film. Afterwards, I prayed and went to sleep.
You probably mean that even if someone is busy, they can experience travelling, meetings or other duties as an opportunity to develop an intense relationship with God.
Yes, the whole day can be a prayer, even if one has less time for prayer itself than we are normally used to. For me, the ideal day is when I don’t have to do anything but pray, read, and celebrate Mass for the first two hours of the morning, unless I have to do it somewhere in public with other people.
I once had an experience with God who challenged me inside me: „Look at your calendar.“ I opened it and heard his voice again: „ You have various duties written there. And where do you have time with me?“
I realised that it’s not enough to pray at any time of day; it’s necessary to set aside time to meet God literally. For me, the morning is the perfect time. This regularity is essential to me and helps me a lot.
Spending time with God is my highest priority. I try to plan it and write it in my diary. If this time is allocated, I don’t schedule anything else during that time.
Are you planning to spend time with God in the long term, for example, by going on a pilgrimage or engaging in spiritual exercises?
Having worked with Lux for a long time, I have organised pilgrimages and stays in Nimnica before, during which I provide spiritual support to attendees and their family members. During those days, I aimed to share my knowledge with others and also to learn from them.
During our pilgrimage to Turkey, I found the ruins of St. Philip’s Church particularly moving. According to tradition, this apostle was martyred and buried here. The other pilgrims went off in different directions, and I had some free time, but I just stayed there for about forty-five minutes. I like moments like this. Solving nothing, thinking about nothing, just being with the Lord, and exposing myself to his presence.
Spiritual exercises, renewals, and conferences are also integral to my life as a priest. I need to find somewhere to draw. As the priest František Blachnicki said: ‘Life is from Life!’
In recent years, we have heard a lot about the crises of masculinity and fatherhood, and about toxic masculinity. How can we raise boys to become the right kind of men?
We men need to be together to learn to enter our inner world, which can be very rich, in a safe environment where we can acknowledge our weaknesses and joys, and then speak openly about them. It is therefore beneficial to have a healthy male community around us that can properly motivate us and, at the same time, encourage us to take greater freedom.
Because if we don’t have brothers and friends around us to open our hearts to, we remain trapped in our inner chambers and stuck in unhealthy stereotypes that we often inherit from our fathers or other authorities.
When we look at one statistic from Slovakia, it can tell us a lot about the state of the male soul: in 2022, 563 people committed suicide, of which 464 were men. Even new cases of psychological problems increase much faster in men than in women. Behind those numbers are specific fathers, sons, mates…
Prejudice still controls us. We need to constantly dispel various false beliefs, such as the idea that men shouldn’t cry. This is what has been instilled in us from an early age: ‘Don’t cry, you’re not a baby.’ It sounds innocent enough, but the consequence is that some men’s emotional lives are stifled. Now, we must teach them again that crying is as natural as laughing.
Another common misconception is that the right person will take care of everything. After all, we also fail and fall; we are not mythical superheroes. There’s no need to be afraid to admit it; otherwise, we live under constant pressure, stress, and a lack of freedom. The discrepancy between our expectations and reality can drive us to turn to deceptive outlets such as alcohol, gambling, and pornography.
Some say that physical strength is enough, but without inner strength, a person will quickly break down. Depression and anxiety are real diseases, not excuses. There is no shame in therapy; it can be a form of spiritual growth and development. Tenderness is not effeminacy; it is the language of love that we all need. Manliness is not about posing, but about truth. And the truth will set you free.
Attention, love, and acceptance within a family, community, or parish are key to creating a place where we can feel at home. If that is the case, we have no reason to leave. A good place to start is to answer the following simple question honestly: ‘How are you?’
Every person should know that no one is alone. And more important than never falling is learning to get up, over and over again. Because falling is human, lying devilish, and getting up is what God himself constantly invites us to do.
Can other men, in particular, help men grow in faith?
When we look at the church pews, we mostly see women. Thank you to them! However, many men feel that the church is too effeminate an environment for them. Therefore, it is important that men on their own faith journeys can also rely on other men.
In Kazakhstan, which is a majority Muslim country, it is common to see men praying not only in mosques but also on the streets at prescribed times. At the same time, we Christians have a problem blessing each other before the cross or before meals or greeting each other in Christian terms. Father Michal Zamkovský summed it up perfectly when in the book I Confess Slovakia, he said: „When men pray together, hell shakes.“ I believe that if men lived their faith entirely, the church would be a completely different place.
God created us for relationships. None of us is an island, least of all in terms of spiritual growth. A man needs another man, not because a woman has nothing to say to him or that the church is not a community of all, but because a man’s heart is formed specially precisely in confrontation with another man and near him.
When a man looks at a man who lives faith authentically, who is not afraid to admit his weakness, who struggles and does not give up, then a deep desire awakens in him: „I want to live like this too, I want to stand, I want to believe too!“ And that is the gift we give each other.
Let’s look at Jesus. He too chose twelve men whom he shaped, with whom he ate, walked, prayed, and whom he took with him to silence and to the match. Peter, Jakub, and John – they were brothers in the struggle of faith. They dragged each other, encouraged each other, but also confronted each other.
Of course, growing in faith is not just about male groups – it’s about Christ. But God often uses other men to sharpen us. As the Book of Proverbs says: „Iron grinds itself with iron and one person grinds another.“ (Proverbs 27:17) This means that our character is shaped by openness, sincerity, friendship, and a sense of fraternity.
Therefore, men must seek fellowship with men so that they are not afraid to share their struggle, their falls, and their victories. It’s not a sign of weakness – it’s a sign of wisdom. Because whoever closes himself off will weaken sooner or later. But whoever opens himself up to his brother finds support, advice, and strength to keep walking.
So yes – men best help men grow in faith when they themselves live with Christ and when they dare to be brothers, not rivals.
In various men’s podcasts, the opinion is often voiced that teenage boys today are deprived of male initiation.
We have nothing in our Christian culture that resembles the Jewish bar mitzvah ceremony. In the past, from a secular point of view, it was at least a military service, to which a boy would leave and a man would return. Yes, many have also experienced various negative or downright humiliating experiences, but the fact is that for the generations before us, it was a form of initiation.
For me, such an initiation was the time when my father and mother took me to explain how it works between a man and a woman. That’s when I realized that I’m no longer a little kid for them, but they consider me an equal to whom they can talk openly.
This is also why it is good that fathers in various male gatherings take their teenage sons for the weekend or even for a week somewhere in the mountains or on a boat, where the boys can realize, that they are no longer children, but become adults who must learn to take responsibility not only for themselves and their lives, but also for others and their surroundings.
However, some male conferences or spiritual renewals can be organized with a similar goal. The most important thing about it all is that we help boys become men, because otherwise, they will only be grown children.
We often expect maturity to come by itself, to catch up with us one day, like age or circumstances. But the reality is different: maturity comes when I decide to face things head-on. When I no longer run from my duties, but embrace them as a gift that shapes me. The apostle Paul describes it with the words: „ When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I thought like a child. When I became a man, I left my childish ways behind.“ (1 Cor 13, 11)
To sum it up, what helps a man not to be just a grown boy?
A relationship with God, because only with him will he discover who he is and what his potential is. Brothers next to him who encourage him but also challenge him to the truth. Willingness to serve, because talents multiply in the service of others. Courage to take responsibility – even when difficult is the path to freedom. And finally, a man needs to hear God’s voice that tells him: „Don’t be afraid, because I am with you.“ (Is 41, 10) Then he stops hiding behind boyish excuses and begins to grow to the fullness of a man who knows why he is here and to whom he belongs.
Could you recall any examples of good practice?
For me, encouragement is every single man who has been able to take responsibility and put himself at the service of God’s kingdom. I will mention once again Julko Slovák, who has been dragging the entire Godzone project for so many years, which has affected thousands of people.
Matej „Ogar“ Sabo, on the other hand, leads the Father’s Heart project for Slovakia and at the same time the Eben Ezer community. Many people recognized God’s heart right there and could thus experience God’s touch. I could also name many other men who walk in this line and are a support for me in Strapar, Aslan’s table, and other projects or interpersonal relationships.
However, I also know many men who have not yet unlocked the potential of life within themselves, are still playing in their sandbox, and their lives seem to remain empty.
When we ask about men, we must also ask about women. In 2024, your apology to women at the Godzone Women’s Conference during Mass for often not understanding them or giving them their due was very powerful. ‘Please don’t be silent! We need to hear your voice in the Church. We need the talents of each of you; otherwise, we all suffer,” you said. Why did you make this gesture?
It wasn’t about some external symbolism, but rather something I felt in my heart, like a debt. Because I know what women are going through. For a long time, we have not received the respect due to us. We cannot listen to the heart of women, which is much more sensitive than ours. We hurt and humiliate them with our lack of empathy. Many times, we did not listen to their voice, did not take their experience seriously, and at the same time, they bring sensitivity, tenderness, depth, and insight into life that we ourselves will never have.
This is true even within the church, where we address ourselves as brothers and sisters, but reality often does not correspond to this. In many cases, our parishes stand on the self-sacrificing service and prayers of girls and women, mothers and grandmothers, and we do not appreciate them nearly enough. We need to start perceiving their views more, listening to their voice, and inviting them to active service.
Standing there, I realized that men’s silence or indifference to women is a wound that has been passed down for generations. That’s why it was necessary to say „sorry“, not out of guilt, but out of a desire to open a new space of healing, trust, and cooperation. It is rewarding for the church when everyone is given space to bring their gifts. And I felt it was important to name it out loud so that women knew they were needed. That their voice has a place. That their talents are not an accessory, but part of God’s plan.
If women remain silent somewhere in the background, the church will be impoverished. And I long for a church that breathes both parts of the lungs – male and female – and in which we do not hinder each other, but strengthen each other.
This is precisely what Pope Francis did, appointing women to the highest Vatican positions, which, until recently, were held only by male cardinals. Are women in the church flashing for better times?
It is certainly changing for the better, even if I cannot fully assess the speed and complexity of those changes. For example, in animation schools, I notice that most applicants are girls and women, but when I examine the leadership positions, men already predominate there.
However, I also see many other women and girls who have their place in leadership, are accepted and listened to, and can fully bring their gifts to the table. But it is still true that there are fewer of them than men.
We certainly need to think purposefully about where all those women are. In which phase do they disappear, and why? The reason is that men often don’t want to give them space or take on such responsibility themselves. I do not have a clear answer to that myself.
He remembered Pope Francis, who left us on Easter 2025. How did you experience it?
It was a shock to me. We knew that the Holy Father was sick and that it was serious, but we elders recall that Saint John Paul II was also old and ill; yet, despite this, he led the Church for several more years. During that time, we learned to see suffering as part of his pontificate. However, it came suddenly with Francis – on Easter Sunday, we were still watching him during Urbi et orbi, and the very next day we were hit by the news that he had died.
He was a Pope I liked very much. I liked his freedom, his approach to the gate, and his desire for a missionary church that touches the poor and moves from the center to the periphery.
You managed to obtain the name of his successor, Leo XIV. somehow?
It appeals to me that just as Francis emphasizes proclamation and has his own inner freedom, he does not want to be a copy of someone else. He dresses differently from his predecessor; he prefers to visit the papal summer residence in Castel Gandolfo, which Francis avoided. He did not move to the House of St. Martha, but instead stayed to live in his original apartment, stating that he would move to the Apostolic Palace in time.
He has good cards in his hands: he has gone through a religious life, missionary, episcopal, and cardinal service, knows the world, and at the same time served in one of the poorest dioceses. He is a theologian, a church lawyer, and an evangelist. I look forward to receiving the input that his documents and decisions will bring.
Our book interview was created and published during the jubilee year. How do you experience it?
It’s different from the last jubilee years – whether the extraordinary one in 2015 or those before, during the Great Jubilee of 2000. Firstly, as the secretary of the commission responsible for preparing and implementing the jubilee in Slovakia, I am more personally involved. Secondly, I have a more active experience within our dioceses and parishes.
This time it’s not just about some mottos, flyers, or posters being put up somewhere in a church, and that would extinguish it, but I perceive a lot of accompanying activities, spiritual events, and pilgrimages… I have a sense of greater unity that we really are pilgrims of hope who walk together and in doing so are able to say many things openly, admit, acknowledge, beg, forgive…
I believe that this jubilee year really brought us a certain liberation, an inner transformation, that something was sown here that will bear fruit in a few years.
The gesture of begging Spiš diocesan bishop Francis Trstenský resonated particularly strongly, even outside the church space. Can it be described as a breakthrough gesture?
I think so. He himself considered it the culmination of the jubilee year at the diocesan level. However, I believe it is particularly significant that Bishop Francis did not stop there, but also asked all priests to carry out a similar gesture of apology in their parishes. In fact, he went even further and asked men, women, fathers, mothers, and even children in families to forgive each other. It was intended as a stream of forgiveness to cross the entire diocese.
I consider it very important, because we Slovaks often live in unforgiveness, and thus remain trapped in inner unfreedom. Many people are bound by unforgiveness, which the devil uses very intensively to oppress us. At the same time, we pray daily „forgive us, as we also forgive“, but somehow we are not good at it in practice. Even in some languages, this part of the Lord’s Prayer is translated as follows: „… forgive us, because we have already forgiven.“ When we do not forgive, we close ourselves off from what God wants to give us.
And what is it?
It is the liberating inner peace that flows from his merciful love. The Chinese have a saying: ‘Forgiveness is the best revenge.’ When I forgive, I free myself and the other person from the bonds of unforgiveness. I also believe that it is vital for a person’s overall health to avoid living with unforgiveness.
At the same time, we also have Jesus’ words from the parable of the merciless servant, that the heavenly Father will hand over to the torturers anyone who does not forgive his brother from the heart (Mt 18, 34 – 35). It sounds shockingly brutal. Does the Lord God, our merciful Father, really want to torture anyone who cannot forgive another?
I once thought about it for a long time, until I understood that the Lord God does not have to torture anyone at all, because man gives himself over to his inner torturers when he worries about unforgiveness. Simply living in unforgiveness is dangerous; one does not punish the other, but at most oneself.
