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Inner transformation requires us to undergo an unpleasant experience in the dark recesses of our souls. According to the opinions of many …this look is nothing more than an admission of a tendency to impatience or the expression of a particular critical spirit. Most Christians will admit quite readily that their sinfulness is more than just a manifestation of behavior that violates established norms. Of course. We struggle with deeper issues, selfish motives, and so on. But at the level of unconvincing generality, most of the time, it stays.
On the other hand, others resist looking at the ugly inside, preferring
to consider struggles rather than sinfulness. “I don’t have enough self-confidence. I’m just so insecure.” “Why am I such a perfectionist? I take everything too much; I’ll go crazy one day.” Such problems provoke sympathetic concern in others and an almost heroic sense of self-pity in ourselves. On the other hand, confessing our sinfulness is condemned by others. Those who speak of their struggles feel noble, while the sinners feel worthy of scorn.

In many churches, a sincere concern to repair the damage in human life has led to an understanding of man that quietly pushes aside sin
. The truth that suffering people need encouragement sometimes focuses our attention too much on people’s struggles and has weakened our ability to understand their sinfulness. In the efforts of some conservative Christians to emphasize the problem of sin again, we can see an inevitable swing of the pendulum away from an emphasis on “helping the suffering.” In the righteous indignation at modern efforts to mitigate the horror of sin by pointing to its psychological conditioning, these people want to point again to sin in its visible form (fornication, laziness, lying, etc.) to emphasize that people often struggle but also sin.
This observation of theirs is accurate. We certainly struggle as victims
of the unkindness of others. We are victims of someone else’s sin. But we cannot excuse our sinful reactions by saying that others have sinned against us. We are responsible for our actions. We are both strugglers and sinners, victims and perpetrators who suffer and hurt. But notice what has happened. If we look within ourselves, we tend to see ourselves as people struggling with our buried pain and psychological complexes. But when we decide it’s time to get serious about our responsibility to follow God, we return to the surface and try to do what we expected. Struggle tends to be associated with looking inward (“let’s see what your real trouble is”). At the same time, sin is typically handled by transforming our outward actions (“It’s time to stop all this introspection and get to work. How much time do you spend with your wife?”).
Committed Christians who want to change have two options: seek help in honestly exposing the pain in their own heart or accept the responsibility of correcting sin in their behavior. Pain in the heart and sin in behavior are two categories we must contend with. And yet neither of them will lead us to our souls’ dark, ugly, distorted corners. Neither of them will help us penetrate the sin in our hearts that we must touch to be inwardly transformed. Sin affects something more than our outward attitudes (sin in behavior), and we must confront much worse problems than deep-seated psychological problems (pain in the heart).
I do not want to deal with external sinfulness or internal struggles in this chapter. I want to expose the sin in our hearts. However, I want to
The Problem of Demanding to be stricter than those who regard inward sin as a tendency to impatience or the occasional expression of a critical spirit. The problem of our heart is much more severe than many think. When we look into the inside, we find more than just ugly memories and painful feelings. In any case, a candid look will reveal something ugly – demandingness. We are a demanding people. Because we stubbornly pass over God’s water sources and dig our wells, our survival depends on the water we dig. Our self-defense mechanisms don’t – work. If we take responsibility for putting our thirst into our own hands, our survival depends on the success of our quest.
We demand that our partners meet our needs; we demand that our children bear the fruit of our godly activity; we demand that our church be responsive to our needs by providing specific services; we demand that drivers who drive slowly leave the overtaking lane of the highway; we demand that we no longer no one to prepare us for the disappointments we have already experienced; we demand that we be given the legitimate joys that have long been denied us. How absurd! Can you imagine an army in which conscripts and societies whose policy is determined by messengers? And yet, here are mere men shouting their orders into space. Such folly is the inevitable consequence of taking responsibility for our happiness- a burden too heavy for our shoulders. When we accept responsibility for what we desperately desire but have no control over it, we irrationally demand
our efforts succeed. The ugly disease of demanding is deeply wedged in our thirsty souls. Inner transformation demands that we face our demanding problem and do something about it. The spirit of demandingness must be recognized to see it in all its horror and then to rid ourselves of it through repentance. Let’s think together about this problem from three different angles:1) how God sees it, 2) how it arises, and 3) what to do about it.

There are two criteria in love that Jesus gave us.
– The first criterion is expressed in words: “Love your neighbor as yourself!” (Lv 19:18). If you do not love yourself, you cannot fully love your neighbor. That is why I have spoken to you about accepting yourself. If you reject yourself, condemn yourself, do not forgive yourself, pull yourself aside, do not recognize your charisma in yourself, and do not love yourself, you cannot love others. You can only love to the extent that you love yourself. If you do not accept yourself, you cannot accept others. If you cannot forgive yourself, you cannot forgive others.
– But then Jesus gives us a second criterion in the New Testament when he says: “The new commandment I give to you, that you love one another. That you also love one another, as I have loved you.” The novelty of this commandment is not in the injunction “Love one another”-we already find that in the Old Testament. The novelty is in the words-” as I have loved you.” The criterion of loving “as yourself” is no longer sufficient. The criterion has become “as I have loved you” (cf. Jn 13,34). And how did Jesus love us? Unconditionally. Next, we will try to explain the word “unconditionally.” This is newness in love.

The difference between secular and Christian love
It will be good to tell ourselves the difference between worldly and Christian love. Ordinary love is based on feelings, attraction, and sympathy. We see this on television or in reading love novels. The decision to forgive Christian love and forgiveness is based on a decision, not feelings. We must understand this. Often, people come to me and say: “I don’t know if I have  forgiven that person or not.” It is impossible to doubt whether we have forgiven someone because forgiveness is a decision we have come to. It is a question of wanting or unwillingness. If you want to forgive a person, you have already forgiven him. If you don’t want to forgive someone, you haven’t forgiven them. Hence, the doubt whether we have forgiven or not doesn’t exist. If we have forgiven someone, it does not mean that we have immediately healed from all the wounds that we have in our hearts. If I have forgiven you, it does not mean that I will immediately start liking you, that I will immediately if I didn’t like you before. Sympathy has nothing to do with love or hatred. If I don’t like someone, that doesn’t mean I hate them. If I like someone, it doesn’t mean I love them. Sympathy or antipathy is an emotional affair that can lead to hate or love but does not necessarily end hate or love.
For example, I’m sure the Pharisees were not sympathetic to Jesus, but that doesn’t mean he hated them. But he certainly wasn’t emotionally attracted to them. It is often the case that we need to distinguish between love and sympathy. What does it mean to love someone and feel compassion for someone? Attraction to a person, positive or negative, has nothing to do with love or hate. And this is where we need to look at the difference between Christian and secular love.

For the days immediately following the feast of the Nativity of the Lord, the oldest liturgical calendars already list a group of feasts of saints. The Middle Ages, which saw these saints as honorary guides of the newborn King, named them “Comites Christi” – Christ’s guides. In the Roman liturgy, they are the first martyr, Stephen (December 26), the apostle and evangelist, John (December 27), and the children whom Herod had murdered in Bethlehem (December 28). According to St. Bernard, for these three days, we are presented with representatives of the threefold manner of holiness who adore the newborn King: martyrs by desire and, in fact (Stephen), martyrs only by desire (John), and martyrs only by deed (the Innocents).
The feast of St. Innocents probably originated in the West. It is first mentioned in the calendar of the North African city of Carthage in 505. Even before that, the martyrdom of these children was mentioned by many Church Fathers. The date of this feast was influenced by its connection with Christmas. The feast had a mournful character due to Gallic influence, reflected in the liturgical vestments’ purple color and the celebratory hymn’s omission. It is only since 1960 that the day has had features typical of the feast of the martyrs. Nowadays, on this day, in many places, a devotion is held for the modern-day Innocents, the unborn children.
In today’s Gospel, we find the angel’s command: “Arise, take the child and his mother with you, and go into Egypt, and stay there until I let you know, for Herod will seek the child to destroy him.” Indeed, you have noticed that even though we all know this is the little Jesus, the Gospel is somewhat general: “…he will seek the child to destroy him!” As if it’s not just about this child and just about Herod. Behind this effort of Herod is Satan, who has been a murderer of men from the beginning. Above all, every father and mother must protect his child from this threat. Every child can develop into the perfection of the God-man. And so become the image of God. That is why the devil hates man.
Perhaps it is in this context that it is appropriate to reflect on what a terrible crime against God’s love abortion is. God wants life and never consents to death. Death is a consequence of our sinful existence, but it is not something God would want. God weeps over Adam’s fall. Jesus wept over the death of Lazarus. God did not create death, nor did He ever consent to it. Theologians say that even in the death of the Son of God, the Father only conceded because He already had the Resurrection before His eyes. Jesus conquered death. God wants man, but man does not wish to man. And that is painful.
The people of the biblical era were fully aware of one truth that is somehow obscured to modern man: the truth of a Creator God who forms a child in the womb of the mother. In many places in the Holy Scripture, we find this truth expressed. In calling the prophet Jeremiah, God says: “Before I formed you in your mother’s womb, I knew you.” (Jer. 1:5). The implication is that we are the object of God’s concern even before we are conceived in our mother’s womb. Even before our conception, God thinks of us with love and has a plan of Salvation prepared for us.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church speaks to this theme:
“God created man to be his image; he created him to be the image of God, as male and female he created them” (Gen. 1:27). Man occupies a unique place in creation: he is “the image of God”: in his nature, he unites the spiritual and material worlds: he is created as man and woman: God made him his friend. Of all visible creatures, man alone is “capable of knowing and loving his Creator,” “he is the only creature whom God willed for his own sake,” man alone is called to share in the knowledge and love of the life of God for which he was created and which is the main reason for his dignity.”
Human life is to be respected and protected from the moment of conception. From the very first moment of its existence, the human being must be accorded the rights of a person, among which is the inviolable right of every innocent being to life. Since the first century, the Church has taught that every induced abortion is a moral evil. This teaching has not changed. Direct abortion, that is, wanted as an end or as a means, seriously contradicts the moral law: “Thou shalt not kill a fetus by abortion, nor put to death a newborn child” (Didache)
Knowingly and willingly, and not merely materially, cooperating in abortion is a grave sin. The Church punishes this crime against human life with the canonical penalty of excommunication (excommunication from the Church). “Whoever causes an abortion that occurs falls into ex-communication, imposed by a prior judgment, ‘by the very act of committing the tort’ and under the conditions laid down by law. The Church does not intend thereby to narrow the sphere of mercy. It stresses the gravity of the crime committed and the irreparable harm caused to the innocent person killed, to his parents, and society as a whole.
Since the embryo is to be treated as a person from conception, it must be protected in its integrity, treated, and healed, as far as possible, like any other human being. “Prenatal diagnosis is morally permissible if it ‘respects the life and integrity of the human embryo and fetus and is directed toward its preservation or healing. However, it is in serious conflict with the moral law if it anticipates, depending on the results, the possibility of inducing an abortion. A diagnosis must not amount to a death sentence.
We can understand this crime’s seriousness even from reading these parts of the RC. The fact that it is happening around us and carried out in large numbers does not prove the legitimacy of the practice but rather the wickedness of the society in which we live.
In conclusion, the statement of St. John Chrysostom:
“What kind of being is this, then, that has been created with such solemnity? It is man, a great, admirable, and living figure, who is of greater worth in God’s sight than all the rest of creation: he is man, and for his sake, the heavens and the earth and the sea and the whole creation exist: to his salvation God attached such importance that for his sake he did not spare even his only-begotten Son. God has untiringly used every means to cause man to ascend to Himself and sit down at His right hand.”

John the Apostle, also known as John the Evangelist, was one of twelve apostles of Jesus Christ. He is often referred to as the disciple whom Jesus loved. John played a significant role in the early Christian community and impacted Christian theology and literature.According to the New Testament, John was the son of Zebedee and Salome and the brother of James, another disciple of Jesus. He was originally a fisherman by trade before being called be Jesus, to follow him. Alonside Peter and James, John was part of Jesus’inner circle, being present at important events lie the Transfiguration ans tehe Last Supper. John is best known for his close relationship with Jesus and deep spiritual insights. He is credited with writing several essential texts in the New Testament, including the  Gospel of John, which emphasizes the divinity of  Jesus and his teachings on love and eternal life. John’s gospel also contains unique accounts of miracles and events not found in the other gospels.

Tradition holds that John lived a long life, and in his later years, he was exiled to the island of Patmos. Where he received visions and wrote the book of Revelation, the last book of the New Testament. The Book of Revelation contains apocalyptic visions depicting the final judgment, the victory of good over evil, and the establishment of God’s kingdom.

John’s writings and teachings have had a profound impact on Christianity. Shaping its theology, understanding of Jesus’ teaching, and views on life, faith, and eschatology. His emphasis on love as a central virtue and his professional insights into the nature of God have made him one of the most influential figures in Christian history.

Which two words do you think are most often used to describe Christmas? In my opinion, it is JOY and PEACE. Both are also regularly heard at Christmas greetings. Even on the outside, everyone tries to live these words – to enjoy being with their neighbors and protect themselves from all the mistakes disturbing our moments together. The newborn Son of God gives us joy and peace so that we can spread them further and further. It still means under all circumstances. The joy and peace we receive are not meant to last only now or until the New Year, nor is it meant to serve only for our benefit, but to reach all people, even those with whom we do not get along. Sv. Stefan believed in Christ and was chosen among the first deacons. He did not experience the joy and peace of the gospel only in the first moments of his faith, but he also preserved them in the rough moments when his life hung in the balance and finally ended violently. This peace helped him forgive his tormentors and may have been the beginning of the conversion of St. Pavla, who guarded the clothes of furious stoners as a young man.

If we want, we can let ourselves be filled with the abundant joy and peace experienced by the people gathering at the manger. But you have to be able to keep that peace. It often happens that we can’t even bring it correctly home. Even after leaving the church, little things can turn us off, e.g., that the other driver did not give us priority, that children are running and not paying attention to cars, or similar things. These are not small things, but they often cause more anxiety than is necessary for ordinary caution. When we lose peace, so does joy. And our mission of peace-spreaders is failing because of this. And if we are to spread peace and joy to strangers, it is all the more difficult because we have nothing to do with them, and many could be stolen from us. But the joy of Christ is to reach all people; therefore, we must not be idle so that they, and after all, neither do we lose precious gifts because of our laziness. But we will remain steadfast and faithful disciples of Christ, especially when we maintain this rare peace and joy despite difficult life circumstances.

Not everyone has to experience persecution, where you can endure only with God’s help. Even if we suffer from many material and spiritual shortcomings, such as poverty or pain, we can maintain life’s optimism that with God’s help, things will get better, and we can be an encouragement to those around us. After all, the essence of martyrdom is to give up something of yourself, or even all of yourself, for the love of Christ and in the constant hope that he will give us true joy and happiness. And in these everyday life situations, we often have to renounce ourselves. When we do it with a smiling face, we fulfill our role as peacemakers excellently.

This event occurred in the Russian countryside three years after the Bolshevik Revolution. Communists came to the village to create a collective farm. The priest had been in exile in Siberia for a long time, so the temple was turned into a shed. Citizens signed up for fear of starvation and gave the remnants of their farms to the party. Young Sergej had nothing to give because there was nothing left at home. He started working in the new Kolkhoz as a reaper. He was very friendly, and his colleagues liked him. But the party did not like him. He never stopped expressing his religious beliefs. He prayed regularly and did not forget to bless himself before work and eating. He seemed dangerous to the party members. They tried to make his life as unpleasant as possible. They gave him hard work and the most demanding meadows, and they kept moving him, but they could not change his friendly behavior or religious beliefs. He ended up in bass. Here, he suffered just as much, if not more, because it was primarily non-political prisoners who gave him trouble.

He became the target of ridicule and humiliation for his “religious naivety.” But nothing broke him. When a fellow prisoner asked him how he could endure in such a fortress, he said: “Why should I cry and curse, when I know that if God has visited me once and pleased me and will not leave me again, but is waiting for me to come to him in faithfulness. “That’s what happened before too long. Exhausted, he fell one day and died two weeks later with a blissful expression on his face. And his fellow prisoners, excited by such perseverance, never gave up their joy, the only one that no one could take away from them. Let the joy and peace that we bear shine through our lives, especially where there is sadness. 

Brothers and sisters! During these festive days, everyone probably wishes to spend them in peace. We want happiness, health, and joy and give each other gifts. Our attitude expresses how we imagine an ideal Christmas. This is how we would like to experience them ourselves. Enough is said about love between people, about understanding and forgiveness. We seem kinder, more willing, considerate, and more tolerant towards each other. Sometimes, it looks like some idyll that is far from reality. I don’t want to disturb the well-being of any of us. I want to spend Christmastime like this. We all fondly remember the time when we were still small. We were looking forward to Christmas dinner. We were looking forward to the gifts. Well, they weren’t just gifts. We also enjoyed family traditions.

I don’t want to burden you with memories on this day. We all have some. Well, the older we get, the more we realize that if we stick to wishes and wishes during Christmas, no matter how sincerely expressed, it’s nice, but it’s not enough. If we want peace, we must create peace and live with others. In the Scriptures’ words: To regard others as more worthy than oneself. If we wish for well-being, we must take care of it ourselves. And so we can forgive each other and won’t just play some theater during those days, it’s completely fine between us. If we want love, we must give it and spread it selflessly, without any expectations. It will not fall from the sky itself. And when we wish for tolerance and consideration, we must commit ourselves to it. In other words, behave tolerantly and considerately.

And we hope the whole family will get together, it’s pleasant because not all families are together these days. However, even lonely people, abandoned by their families and forgotten by society, live Christmas today. How do they experience the time of joy and delight? If we base ourselves only on having enough of everything – both for eating and drinking – Let us also thank God that we are not in need! That we have a roof over our heads. We have those with us who care about us, and we care about them. These are not self-evident or automatic things. Well, let’s also think about those who are not allowed this! Let’s think of the seriously ill, for whom this Christmas may be the last in their lives! Let us think of people who are going through difficult trials. Let’s remember the children in hospitals and orphanages! We think of the unemployed and the needy, who must humble themselves. How will all of them experience the “Silent and Holy Night”?

Dear believers, why should we ask such severe questions at the beginning of the festive days? Because we are no longer children, we look at this time differently than we did years ago. We have to ask ourselves these uncomfortable questions because it is reality. Today, we are led by the spirit of the times to a material view of these holidays. We are bombarded with challenges from all sides; what else do we need for a peaceful and wonderful Christmas,  without which we will certainly not survive happily? I guarantee we are still missing some great products for a peaceful Christmas.

But let’s not forget that the magic of these days lies in other content. If we don’t fill Christmas with spiritual content and stay only on the material level, we will enjoy some gifts for a while, but even the best surprise will become ordinary. I mean that unless the holidays of the birth of Jesus Christ change us internally and long-term, unless this time leads us to reflect on life and the values ​​for which we live, unless this time brings us closer to God, the originator and source of love, peace, peace, forgiveness, tolerance, willingness, or consideration – then it will not be a good and fully lived time. As I already indicated, even during this Christmas, there are quite a few people in the world who are fighting. I don’t even think about war conflicts. Instead, I think of the internal struggles of specific people. Seriously ill, abandoned, etc.

Of course, even that first Christmas was probably anything but ideal. It must have been tough to walk in labor pains crisscrossing Bethlehem and be rejected with everything occupied. It must have been an internal struggle to bring a child into the world among the animals in the stable – in the smell, the dirt, and the harsh conditions of the stone cave. And yet. Neither Maria nor Jozef gave up then. Mary did not protest when she learned that she would become the mother of Jesus. Joseph did not object to marrying his pregnant fiancée. They did not even protest against the order of the emperor Augustus and finally humbly accepted the manager for the animals as a cradle for the newborn child. And all this in the joy that they could be at God’s historical intervention. That they could be involved. That they could participate in it. That it was they who had the grace to bring into the world and further educate the future Savior of the whole world.

You are correct that Christmas is still a struggle for many today. For the sick person, this struggle may consist of a decision – will I accept my lot in silence, humility, and, at the same time, hope? Jesus came also to carry me through death and give me eternal life in his kingdom… This struggle consists of a possible decision for someone without a job-will. I accept that my life has meaning and value even if I don’t work. Even so big that the little born boy then gave his life for me? For a well-off person, the Christmas struggle may lie in a decision – will I think more and support those who have found themselves in need through no fault of their own? God has blessed me a lot… For our children, this struggle probably consists of a decision – will I accept the born Jesus into my young life as a model of how to be a parent and obedient to authorities, or will I continue to pretend that everything always and every time has to revolve only around me? For parents, the Christmas struggle lies in the decision: Will I tell my children about this Jesus more than once a year at Christmas? Will I accompany them to the temple so they recognize from a young age that they are a part of the big family – the church? Will I fulfill my promise to God at my child’s baptism? This time is a time of internal struggle in one ordinary matter: whether? Well, we could continue like this.

Brothers and sisters, this time is a time of internal struggle in one ordinary matter: whether I will accept the newborn Jesus and the message he brings into my life. Therefore, let us all open our lives to Him who came so we may have abundant life. For the One who came with love, tranquility, peace, reconciliation, forgiveness, self-sacrifice – and wants to fill this Christmas and the whole next year with all of this in us and our families.